11 months from now

I began the month with a post called 11 reasons. So, for pure speculation, here are my guaranteed accurate predictions for the next 11 months, until I participate in the Slice of Life Challenge (regularly) again:

1. I will continue to struggle with my life / work balance, even during the summer. Making this tolerable for me and my family will be a factor in finding joy.
2. My dog will continue to inspire stories of all kinds – fiction, frustration, and life lessons. It’s worth it, and it will get better and better.
3. I will continue to miss my mother, at key moments, random moments, and life anniversaries. Friends and family will help hold me up and pull me through, and I will be grateful.
4. Travel and trying new things will take hold of my spirit maybe more than ever. The world is too big and the time too limited for us not to make the most of it!
5. Being with my son and stepson will push me as a father into new levels, and hopefully help them see me as a confidant and support… and occasionally even a fun guy! (insert dad joke about mushrooms!!)
6. Inspiration – I will seek it in usual ways (movies, books, podcasts) and more abstract ways (sitting in a museum or garden or lecture comes to mind). Hopefully those moments will turn into action more than just abstract emotions.
7. More collaboration and bridge building with colleagues and less silo-ing and sitting quiet.
8. Speaking of inspiration – I have been in a season of waning faith. Time to push through and rebuild some spiritual habits and connections again.
9. Beyond spiritual health, it’s becoming more clear that we need to make other healthy habits in the exercise and diet department if we want to celebrate into our 50s instead of roll down the hill!!
10. Learning to live with quiet – the empty nest stage will begin soon after both boys are out of the house at college, and all of those frustrations with noise and appetite will be elsewhere. Will we find joy in the sound of silence?
11. Learning to embrace being a writer – this should be clear to me after two years of Marches. Now, instead of looking back, I should write on! Seize the story! Carpe Fabula!

Thanks for reading!

Dream Out Loud!!

Dustin

Deductive Thinking… aka No Sh*t, Sherlock!

Well, some days you get your dog from the kennel and all is joyful, and some days the dog poop hits the fan! Today was sadly the latter… but what exactly happened took a stinky ride home and my best deductive skills.

Here’s the situation in short: Got the dog and his wagging joy from the kennel and the other items we left with him, except for the fleece blanket that we left to keep him warm. The employee went into the backroom and produced the missing blanket, so we wagged our way out the door. In the parking lot we encountered a few of their roaming chickens and gave them the appropriate interest before Jiffy jumped into the back seat to head home.

And that is when I smelled the problem. Then looked down to see some runny ickiness on my clothes… and on the dog seat… and ALL OVER THE BLANKET! I will spare you the descriptive paragraph about what it looked like, but there’s a future writing challenge there! Instead, I’ll let you just guess what I said repeatedly as I removed what I could and set them in the trunk. Too late to do much more than ride this out with the windows down and the wagging dog sticking his nose out the window and his paws on the crap!

On the way home my mind pieced together what must have happened to lead to this predicament. I deduced that the blanket must have already been laying by the washer because of the goo, but the helper didn’t notice as she was in a hurry to bundle things up and get me out the door. Further, I didn’t notice as the dog happily pulled me out with all of his other sleepover items. Thus, none were aware until we all were wearing the stink.

Needless to say, none of this helped in the resulting drive home, careful disembarking, and endless clean-up process. If only that happy, wagging, fuzzy friend could talk, because I’m pretty sure that when he saw the mess and heard my thought process, he would simply mutter “no sh@t, Sherlock!” and go back to sticking his nose out the window!

Some days you just deal with it and move on, no further deductions necessary. Sh#t happens!!

Unwritten rules for the beach

Upon visiting a beach, there are several unwritten rules to abide:

• Do not set up your station too close to another party.
• Do not stand upwind of another person when spraying sunscreen.
• Do not step on the blanket with sandy feet.
• Do not shake the towels or blankets near another person or party, as it will spray them with sand.
• Do not leave food out, or feed the seagulls – this is urgent!
• Do not spill drinks or get sand on others’ drinks.
• Do not wade in the water too deep without a partner.
• Do not forget where you are stationed (and parked).
• Do not forget to rinse your feet and shake off and brush off everything before getting back in the car.

Why do I know these rules if they are indeed unwritten? Well, one reason is that my parents reinforced these with me each year at the Jersey shore (along with plenty of others that are boardwalk related and no doubt limits that I tested). Another reason is simply common courtesy and kindness to others.

And yet, if they are unwritten, are they required? Are they still rules for all? Were we over-restricted by a grumpy parent or over-idealist vision of the beach? Am I now that role??!

In truth, each of those rules was likely overlooked or violated several times growing up, and into adulthood for sure. So, maybe the most honest answer is that the unwritten rule should simply be the same as the golden rule, and make the beach a place that all can enjoy… until those seagulls steal your sandwich!!

Life or death moment

Today I was blessed with a chance to relax at a pool on a sunny day – quite the opposite of what I hear my hometown was experiencing with snow squalls! After the initial dip in the water to check the temp and float a bit, I decided to do a lap – down and back with my best Michael Phelps impression (which was frankly a wide mix of strokes with no great form!). As I reached the end, my foot settled on a filter vent on the floor under the water, and that moment came back to me again.

It’s a vivid memory which may be tainted by age and experience, but it’s certainly my first and closest life and death moment. I was 5, maybe 6. It was summer and we were with a babysitter from church. They visited a friend’s pool and brought me along. It was fun, but there were several older kids there and I believe I was outside of there social circle at several points. Memory dictates that they were in the deep end and said something about me being a baby and too small to swim in the deep end. It was true that I sucked – truly – at swimming and barely made it through basic swim lessons. I was usually afraid of everything from diving headfirst to treading water as a child. But not in this moment. With the others unaware, they had goaded me into foolishly facing fears.

I jumped into the deep end.

No one saw me do it.

I could not swim, and was quickly under water and not coming up.

I felt my foot hit the filter on the floor of the deep end. In my childhood mind it was sucking me down, holding me under. I could not pull up. I started to give up.

No idea how long I was under, but through the eyes of memory, it was long enough that I was fading, surrendering. I could see those kids from a translucent water reflection, laughing away unaware still. My hubris had gotten the best of me already, at only age 5!

But then… one of the teenagers did realize I was under. And she happened to be a lifeguard! And she earned all of her stripes by diving in, pulling me up, lifting me out, turning me to my side, and allowing a stream of vomitous water to erupt from me as I breathed fresh life once again.

The rest of this specific and everlasting memory involves my parents and phone calls, but strangely there are many gaps. I remember dinner involved McDonalds, which was meant to cheer me up, but my stomach was in no mood for Happy Meals, so my sister scored and I sat on the sofa. I think I met my rescuer again later to offer thanks, but couldn’t tell you a single other thing about that person, that place, or that summer.

But one lap in the pool today flooded all of this back to the forefront of my mind.

And it sounded like a slice to share 😉

HURRY Up… and wait.

I have been moving constantly since about 8 this morning. The mental checklist must all be completed in a timely manner:

• write guest teacher plans
• take care of the dog
• get showered and shaved
• clean the bathroom
• feed the turtle
• deliver dog to kennel
• print and final prep of guest lesson plans
• dishes & laundry
• final packing

… and write a slice! Why all of this madness in just a few hours? Because there is a flight to a sunny place in our near future! But first we must rush to make sure we:

• get to the airport (1.5 hours away)
• get to long term parking and shuttle (time unknown)
• get through TSA (time unknown)
• get to terminal (an hour early – really??!)
• get some food (and a likely bathroom break!)
• get on the plane!
• (notice that these are all “get to” and not “have to” -cause I am trying to appreciate the opportunity and not the hassle!!)

Everything on these lists involves hurry up mode, but I know the truth about travel – most of it is about the wait. Wait in line, wait for others, wait to get places, wait in various transports. It can all be exhausting, as many of you understand. Now, the real key is whether I can appreciate the wait. Can we realize the “get to” wait mode is so much better than those who are in “have to” wait mode (think refugees around the world)? Can I savor moments to read, write, people watch, rest and share? Will all of this hurry up and wait help recharge and refresh my body and soul for the three short days we are away?

well, almost time to pack the car, check the directions, double check everything, and go! Hurry up and (can’t) wait to be there!

Photo by Vitor Almeida on Pexels.com

bitter – sweet

There are times and places that are bound to bring up bittersweet moments, and today I suppose was one of those. My father was in town at our invite, so he and I and my stepson went to our nearby environmental center for a Maple Harvest Fest. My oldest son was working the event, and his mother (my ex) graciously got us tickets for the sold out event. Since 1998 when she began as an intern, this place has anchored us to the area, and helped build community and place for two young (once upon a time!) adults who needed an identity. So, visiting again today brought:

Bitter

• Not bitter like grumpy, but I wished that my party enjoyed themselves as much as I was. I felt at home and connected to the natural and social world in a way that they couldn’t care equally about. The trails there are paved with memories and thoughts, and a few regrets. However, I couldn’t just reminisce with them, but walked more in silence and anxiousness through the experience, wishing that they could feel the same joy, coaxing those loved ones into loving the moment.

Bittersweet

• Watching my dad become less mobile (hip pain), and making more memories without my mother alive is both worthwhile and painful – like two alternating hips moving down the trail.

Sweet

• Seeing my son in a place that he loves, doing work that matters, after growing up within this ever present world is an indescribable parent joy. It’s tempting to sneak back tomorrow to see him teaching at a station, but I can picture him and let him have that time for himself.
• I mean, the pancakes and sausage and applesauce are pretty incredible, but the sweetness of real maple syrup is irresistible icing on top 😉

Regrets, and reminiscing, and love are generally all tied together and connected to people or places or both. Today brought some bittersweet thoughts and feelings along the trail, but if two paths diverged in the woods… well, you know the rest! 😉

courtesy of Shaver’s Creek Environmental Center, 2022

6 word slices of superstition

Things announcer never says but should:

Dustin’s wearing his lucky hoodie tonight!

Things announcer always says but shouldn’t:

They haven’t missed foul shots yet!

Things I should probably stop saying:

I can control my team’s fate!

a short tall tale

My first grade classes are studying a quick folklore unit. Last week was the introduction to some of the many types (fables, fairy tales, folk tales, legends, and tall tales). This week I got their attention by beginning class with a picture of my dog, Jiffy, and the following story:

Jiffy goes zoom!

Kiddos, last month I told you a little bit about my dog, Jiffy. He is a greyhound, and used to be a race dog. He loves to go fast and is built like a cheetah for speed. Here he is racing toward me….

…and back again!

And here he is running away from me. He looks happy, right? Well, last weekend something amazing happened that I bet you won’t believe!

He was running back and forth to get some exercise, when suddenly he must have felt like he was back on the racetrack, because he zoomed right past me and kept going in a circle around the house! I was worried, because if he goes somewhere else it could be dangerous, and there’s no way I am fast enough to keep up with him! So, the next time he came around the house, I reached out and yelled STOP! But he didn’t listen. Instead, he went even faster!

And the next time around the house, my family and I all yelled STOP JIFFY! but he just went faster! I tried to catch him on the next trip around the house, but he went so fast he zoomed right through my legs! Soon we thought he would run out of energy, but not this guy – he just went even faster! At this point, he was barely even touching the ground as he raced around and around. And the next time around I couldn’t believe it, but he was actually above the ground – flying at warp speed!!

Now I was REALLY worried – how would I bring him down?! Because each time around the house, he got higher and higher off the ground, until he was over my head! Once he got to the roof, I knew it was time to stop him the only way I knew how. I raced inside and got some bacon dog treats. He could smell the bacon right away, and he stopped finally… at last! The problem was, once he did that he fell!! and he landed so hard after going so fast that he left a huge crater in the back yard! So, my wife is thinking that we can finally get that pool installed where the hole is!!

And do you know what that speedy dog did the rest of the day? the rest of the weekend?? In fact, I think he is still doing this:

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!

It’s always interesting how far I get before kids say “No way!” But they are always invested, and get the idea quickly that my tall tale is taking something possible (he was a great race dog!) and stretches reality until it becomes impossible! In general, I don’t have a tight plan the first time that I tell my dog tale (it changes each year). And then each subsequent time, I can elaborate and find the best beats – much like a storyteller of lore in days gone by may have held an audience.

I enjoyed holding my audience for a short tall tale!

… And the last truth to this tale is that my wife really does want that pool in the back yard 😉

volley for serve

Too tired to SERVE up a Slice today.

It was a BUMPy night’s sleep,

And I was SET for a loooong day.

So I will SPIKE my drink, unwind,

and soon it’s GAME OVER, until

Day 2 of our volleyball tournament!

Snack Bracket

After this much hoop madness, I’m bound to get the munchies! So, after last year’s Beverage Bracket, it’s time to get some snacks out!

A few qualifiers:

• For this experience, we will say that fruits and veggies lost out in the first round!
• There are endless options that didn’t make the cut at the moment, but will have their One Shining Moment some other year!
• No, I don’t have every one of these in the house currently; but, yes, I have snacked on all of these over the past month or so!!

snack on!

What’s in your Final Four?!

;-P